cosmosextips The Pussys®: Award season ain't over yet!!!!! Hire a sculptor to make several gold replicas of your vagina, then have them molded into individual statuettes. Send an e-vite to all your family members, coworkers and former lovers inviting them over to your house for a black tie dinner party. Build a small stage in your living room and hire a caterer and a live band to really make things pop! Once everyone's been seated, take a deep breath, step up to the stage and get ready to host the sexiest award show of the century! Categories include (but are not limited to): Longest Orgasm, Biggest Dick, Most Athletic Tongue and Best Spanking. And the winner is...YOUR MAN! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips The Hulk: Start weight training three hours a day, seven days a week. Infuse your diet with protein shakes and large doses of anabolic steroids. Yum! Make sure you're eating at LEAST 1,000 extra calories of meat a day. The Atkins Diet is your new BFF! Once your strength has dramatically increased, your biceps are bulging and you've gained about 30 lbs of muscle, it's time to change up the power dynamic in the bedroom! Your new and improved bod will make for endless hours of fun. For example, your man will LOVE lying on your back while you do 100 push-ups, being lifted over your head and thrown through a window or getting pinned down, wrestler style, while you aggressively finger his butthole--and that's just the sexy stuff! When it comes to cuddling and intimacy, he'll feel safe and secure with your massive pythons wrapped around his tiny waist. There's a new Big Spoon in town, mister! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Scent of a Woman: It's time to channel your inner Mariah and create a sexy, all natural fragrance that will drive men WILD! Go to a butterfly farm, harvest two large monarch chrysalises and place them deep inside your vagina. Be sure to abstain from sex for 10-14 days so your little butterfly babies can fully develop! Once they've hatched, say a small prayer thanking Mother Nature for her gifts, spread your pussy's wings and let your babies fly free! Celebrate their birth by masturbating until you have a squirting orgasm. Collect three ounces of your orgasm juices and combine it with a pinch of the butterflies' wing dust, two ounces of sweat, one teardrop, one drop of blood and a spoonful of sugar. Mix well and apply this "Eau de You" to every erogenous zone on your body. Now hit the town with your besties, sit back and let the menfolk come a-running! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips The Martyr: Fall in love when you're young and your career is about to take off, then let all your ambitions take the backseat in the relationship so your man has the chance to shine! Immediately get married and quit your job so you can become a baby-making machine. Pop out a few kids and devote the rest of your life to taking care of them instead of taking care of yourself! Hold a private funeral for your hopes and dreams by writing them down on a piece of paper and burning it in your backyard! Lovingly watch your man's career soar while your own life slips through your very fingers. Feel like a shell of your former self. Remember who you used to be and contemplate suicide, then get on anti-depressants! Thanks to your sacrifices, your man will have an amazing life, not to mention a 24/7 boner that you can kiss every night before going to sleep and dreaming about what could have been. #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips The Aladdin: This one's for all you single gals! You DON'T have to spend V-Day alone. Go to your local flea market and shop around until you find a magic lamp. Haggle the owner down to a fair price and then take the lamp home and get ready to make your dreams come true! Rub it against your pussy three times, or however long it takes until a genie pops out and asks if he can grant you three wishes. Use your first wish to ask for a smokin' hot man with huge hands, an even bigger dick and a bank account that would put Bill Gates' to shame. Use your second wish to ask that your magical new BF be crazily obsessed with you forever. But save that third wish, sister! You never know when you'll need to get your man off the hook for murdering someone out of jealousy, trust. Voila! Alone no more! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Frosty the Snowbitch: Get naked, walk into the woods and bury yourself under a snowdrift. ❄️ Now text your man that you're "horny as fuck" and you want him to ravage you, then drop a pin of your location and send it to him so the search can begin! If he finds you, not only will your rock hard nipples and pale blue skin be the turn-on of the century, but he'll also be forced to use his body to warm you up/fuck you back to life! Brrrrrrr! If your man never finds you or you end up freezing to death, at least you'll know it wasn't meant to be, and you'll finally be able to get over him once and for all. #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Super Fuck Sunday: Tonight's the night to make sex a full contact sport! Tell your man to come over for a sexy Super Bowl party for two, then dress up as his favorite football player, and complete the look with shoulder pads and a helmet. When he walks in the door, tackle him! Make sure you hit as hard as possible to really take him down. It's a pileup! Rip his pants off, lube up your hand and jam your fist into his ass. 👊👊👊 At first he might resist, but soon enough his sensitive prostate will be begging for more! When he finally comes, leap up and do a victory dance to celebrate your 🏈 #touchdown 🏈 then serve him some delicious hot wings and homemade nachos. He'll be celebrating this win all week long! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips The Hercules: If you've been bummed because your man isn't getting aggressive enough in the bedroom, then grab a pen and write down this sexy recipe for a homemade tincture that will drive him INSANE with passion! Combine one tablespoon of water, a spoonful of heroin, 1 line of cocaine, a pinch of angel dust, a fingertip's worth of molly, a bump of meth, a bath salt kernel, 3 crushed up Viagras and 2.5 drops of GHB into an empty eyedropper bottle. Shake it up until it's fully mixed, then apply several droplets to your outer pussy lips. Now grab your man and tell him to go down on you. Make encouraging sounds and hold his head down there so he takes his sweet time. This will allow his body to fully absorb the mixture, and in 10 minutes he will more than ready to ravage you! Make sure to have pepper spray on hand and 911 on speed-dial in case he tries to eat your face, throw you through a window, murder you, etc. But other than that, you should be good to go! So fasten your seatbelt sister, because you're about to be in for the wildest ride of your life! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Cock is the New Black: While your man is sleeping, shave his head, dress him in a prison jumpsuit and handcuff him to the bed. Wake him up at 6:00am by gently poking him with a cattle prod! Inform him that he's "Love Jail" and it's tbd when he'll be released, but as the warden you'll be sure to monitor him for "good behavior." Then slap him in the face and serve him his breakfast: coffee with generous amounts of spit in it, a stale piece of toast and a scrambled egg with one pube. Make sure he eats it all up! Now it's time for "work." Make him go down on you for two hours. If he gets tired, cattle prod him! Serve him lunch: a moldy piece of bread and a slice of Kraft cheese, then let him roam around the backyard in shackles for a few hours of free time. Make him take a shower and sexually assault him with a dildo when he drops the soap! If he gets cantankerous, put him in solitary confinement (the garage). After 48 hours of prison playtime, your man will be so sexually fulfilled he'll be walking on sunshine for weeks! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Gone Fishin': Get on top and start slowly riding your man while lightly tracing your fingers over his lips. Slip your index finger in and out of his mouth and moan with pleasure when he starts to suck on it. Start moving your finger in and out of his mouth a little faster and pick up your fuck pace to match. Now slip your middle finger in as well and watch him slurp it up! Start fucking him super hard and fast, and when you feel him getting close to coming, jam both fingers as far as you can down his throat and curve them in a downward hook motion. Wiggle them around until he starts to gag, then quickly remove them, bury your head in his chest, and let his vom explode all over you! Once your hair is soaking wet with your man's bile, it's your turn to climax! Keep grinding on your man's D and when you're ready, arch your back and powerfully flip your hair back like Ariel coming up from the sea! He'll be so turned on by your Little Mermaid moment and so exhilarated from purging, you'll be a goddess in his eyes for all eternity. #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips While You Were Sleeping: Holiday weight gain shouldn't slow down your sexy! If you're feeling too fat to be frisky, here's a way to let your man have the goods while you get a much-needed detox. Find a doctor who will put you into a medically induced coma for 30 days so you can melt off those extra lbs in your sleep. Once you're comatose, your man can use you as his personal Real Doll! In exchange for unlimited sexual access to all your holes, he will hook you up to a nutrient rich IV every few hours AND change your diapers during your month of slumber. If he protests about the diapers, or tries to hire a nurse, inform him that if he can't handle your doody, he DOESN'T deserve your booty! He should feel blessed to be helping you with your "New Year, new me" transformation journey. Once your 30 day sleep-diet-detox-coma is complete, you'll be back to your fab self and thinner than ever. 2015 will be your best body year yet! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Mile High Guy: If you find yourself sitting next to a hottie at 36,000 feet, it's time to pull this bold, spicy move! When the drink cart rolls by, offer to buy your in-flight crush a cocktail, then strike up a flirty conversation. Drop some serious sexual innuendos, so he knows you're DTF. Ask a flight attendant for a blanket and drape it over both your laps, wink at your crush, then unzip his pants and start warming him up with a firm HJ. Once he's hard, pull out a Swiss Army Knife and hold it at the base of his cock. Inform him that you've got a bomb in your pussy and he can either help you hijack the plane or kiss his wiener goodbye. Force him to come to the bathroom with you to "extract the explosive" and then fuck him at knifepoint! This sexy roleplay will pique his interest AND keep him on his toes. And hey, if he happens to report you and there's an emergency landing that ends with you being escorted off the plane by an air marshall, don't let it get you down! You'll gain notoriety and maybe even get to stay in a city you've never been to before, so stay positive, chica! There are plenty of fish in the sea. #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Sleep Orgasm: While your man is sleeping soundly next to you, begin writhing around and softly moaning his name. Start quietly and slowly build up to a window-shattering decibel! Grind on his leg until he wakes up and then roll away from him and hump a pillow. Roll onto your stomach while grabbing all the sheets and wail like he's pounding you harder than you've ever been pounded before! Then stop everything you're doing and lie still for 30 seconds. Just when your man thinks you've gone back to sleep, start getting dream-fucked even louder and more violently! Flop around like a fish, flail your arms about and thrash back and forth so your man can't interrupt your "dream." For the grand finale, scream that you're going to "COME SO FUCKING HARD OH MY GODDDDD," then pee all over yourself. When he finally manages to shake you awake, hug him tight and tell him he's so sexy that you just squirted in your sleep. Cry a little bit so he really believes you. Repeat this confidence-boosting move at least twice a week to ensure that your man feels like the studliest stud on the block. Yes, you'll be doing way more laundry than usual, but it'll be SO worth it. Wet dreams aren't just for men anymore! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Merry XXXmas: If your man is being cagey about introducing you to his family over the holidays, it's time to take matters into your own hands! Fill a life-sized gift basket with chocolate, champagne, cookies, jam and other yummy goodies. Now climb into the center of the basket wearing a festive pair of panties, a garter belt and sequined booby tassels. Have your bestie place you in a huge box and FedEx you to your man's parent's house for Xmas! Once you've been delivered, wait patiently in your box under the tree until Christmas morning. Stay extremely still so no one knows that you're in there. When someone finally opens up your "gift," pop out of the basket and perform a sexy strip tease for the entire family! Shake your tits in each family member's face and give them all a personal lap dance to properly introduce yourself, then pop the bottle of champagne to celebrate being part of the family! They will love what an inventive, free spirit you are! Your dance and your gift basket will both be such huge hits that it'll make for a Christmas they never forget. #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips The Santa Test: Say you're going out to buy some "last minute Christmas gifts," and leave your man home alone. Hang some ornaments from your tits and stuff a large candy cane in your pussy, then put on a fat suit and dress up in a Santa costume. Complete the look by gluing on a beard! Shimmy down the chimney and surprise your man with your new Santa makeover. 🎅 Straddle him and ask him in your huskiest voice if he's been naughty or nice this year. If he answers "nice," rip off the fat suit and give him a taste of your sweet, minty pussy treat! Then bend over and let him stuff your stocking alllllllll night long.😉 HOWEVER, if your man says he's been "naughty," shove a handful of coal in his mouth and break up with him immediately! Pack your bags so you can get the hell out, and right before you leave, take an epic poop in every toilet in the house and "forget" to flush. The LAST thing you need for Christmas is a bad boy, honey! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Fantasy Fuck: Show up at your man's house unannounced wearing a chic equestrian outfit, complete with a riding crop. Use the crop to knock on the door, and when your man answers, slap him in the face with it! Kiss him on the mouth and say "You're MY little pony tonight." Shove him inside and make him get naked and go wait for you in the "stable" (his bathroom). Now it's time to transform him into the sexy unicorn pony of your dreams! Make him wear a colorful, rainbow wig and insert a long, swinging purple ponytail butt plug into his ass. Once he straps a vibrating dildo to his forehead, the metamorphosis will be complete! Mount him and have him take you on a tour of Ponyland (his house). Remember, this is YOUR fantasy. If he breaks character, he gets the crop! Complete your Ponyland adventure by making him fuck you in the Dream Valley (his bedroom) with his forehead dildo. When you've climaxed, put him back in the stable for a good night's sleep, while you slumber blissfully in his bed. He will LOVE being your subservient unicorn pony boy so much that this might become a monthly, or even a weekly (fingers crossed) event! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Sexy Gift Guide: Struggling with what to get your man's parents for Christmas? Just shave off both your pubes and fashion them into a beautiful wreath! For added flair, decorate it with a few pieces of holly, a dingleberry and a tooth. This holiday season, it's truly the thought that counts. ☺️🎄#CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips Chuckle Butt: This one's for the gays AND the gals! Forge a medical/dental permit and use it to buy a tank of Nitrous Oxide. Be sure to hide it in a secret spot in your house that only YOU can access! Connect one end of a rubber tube to the tank's tap and insert the other end tube into your butt and fill yourself to the brim with that sweet, yummy Nitrous gas. Now invite your man over for a sexcapade! When things start to get hot and heavy, flip over onto your stomach and ask him to give you a rim job. If he balks, tell your man that if he's not ready to go downtown, you'll find someone else who will! This will surely whip him into shape, and he'll be licking your backdoor in no time. Once your man is up close and personal with your booty, moan blissfully while slooooooooooowly releasing little bursts of Nitrous farts into his mouth. He'll be so aroused by how much pleasure he's giving you and so euphoric and giddy from the gas, he'll want to toss your salad every day! #CosmoSexTip
cosmosextips DIY For Your Guy: Channel your inner flower child, stop shaving your armpits and start letting the hair grow out au natural! Stop shaving your pubes as well. Once your armpit hair gets to a good length (about 3 inches) braid in some extensions and use hair wax to create strong, sexy dreadlocks that extend about 3-4 feet in length from each pit. Buy a small slab of wood from Home Depot and drill two holes on either side. Loop your armpit dreads through the holes and knot them underneath, making sure the knots are secure! Buy some plaster at Hobby Lobby and use it to mold your grown out, bushy, "down there" hair into a 6-8 inch dick sculpture. Your man will love swinging back and forth on your armpit hair swing while your plaster pube dick fucks him in the ass. Your body is a wonderland AND a playground! #CosmoSexTip
